Unexpected Path to Destiny (pt 2 of 2)- 1997 Grey Course – Ahr Zhe Winnie (97.04)

The Lost Known Path to Ibiza (part 2 of 2)

[00:46:31] About a half hour later, a well-known European actress came in and said to Harrison, Don’t forget that there’s a dinner party tonight at my house and bring your friend. So, I went from Sandy’s bar into the Kempo in Ibiza to this little palace in the middle of the, in the middle of the valley. And I sit down there with people who till this day, are very close to me, friends of mine. And one of them was an English painter, Roger, Roger Dixon. I called him the last impressionist. I don’t think he ever liked that. [00:47:02][31.7]

[00:47:06] that house of a English actor John Hurt and he’d been given this house to live and to paint in and he asked me if I had a place to live and I said no. He said, well you can live on the roof of my house. And so, my first two months in Ibiza I lived on the roof of John’s, John Hurt’s house, enjoying myself, actually, except that I didn’t have any money and I certainly didn’t have anything to do. And uh, my friend, the painter, he said to me, you know, he said there’s a, there’s a woman that runs a school for foreigners. You know, maybe you can get a job as a teacher. And that was easy for me, because it’s all I had done so much teaching in my life. So, I went to see her. She died this last year. She was a real out eye for me. I went to see her Mary, Mary Blackstoned, uh, a Canadian from the west coast of Canada half Indian with a Norwegian husband. Pioneer to many of these people. She had five children. They had no school. So she built the school and eventually became the school where the foreigners could put their kids. And the moment that she met me, she said, yes. We need a teacher. And I ended up having to teach five different subjects because, of course they were always suffering from lack of teachers. The, I looked very strange things in those days, I wore what looked like Arab booktae on my head. That’s too much too many stories to tell, but nonetheless I looked very strange. It looked like John the Baptist from New York and, uh, I had no place to live. And Mary said to me, well, you have a place to live. I said, no. She said, Well, you know, I have a friend of mine that owns a piece of land in a mountain, but there’s no house there. I said that’s okay. I went up there and took a look at this beautiful place overlooking the Mediterranean. You could see half of the island and looked like. Well, it felt like Olympus. It was a beautiful place. There was an ancient ruwena behind it, but there was the walls were already down below the ankle. And I went to the school the next day and I said to her, could I have a chair? She said, yes. And I took that chair and walked up the mountain. And there was a time, the place was all terraces, terraces. And there was this tiny terrace, about this corner here. And it had a lobe tree, a carob tree, big ole carob tree. And I climbed up into that tree and I put the chair of the tree, and that’s where I lived for a year. I went from being super-yuppie with every toy in the world and all the conveniences of Western life and I spent my first year in Ibiza living in a tree. I had no shelter. I had a wonderful time up there. My students loved it. This weird man would come walking down the mountain and come into the classroom and teach them all this stuff. And then they would follow me back up this mountain and they would see that I really indeed live in a tree. Something that I, that made me quite notorious in those days. It was very beautiful for me. I would sing myself to sleep at night. Acappella. I don’t, don’t know where the ballad was at, but I have an enormous memory and I probably have three or four or five thousand songs in my head. So, I could amuse myself. It was very meditative, and it was very peaceful, and it was the beginning of my process. I spent a number of years teaching there. I left the school I couldn’t handle all those restrictions and I had an experimental school for a while. And then my process really changed. It went into a, it went into a world where I could no longer be able to function properly with other human beings,and it was at that point that basically I left everything behind and, well, went wild, as it were. I just disappeared again, in a way. I went up into the mountains. I left behind all of my responsibilities. All of the people that were in my life. I simply wanted to be alone. To live in nature and I would live after that for three and a half years where I would never touch money. Three and a half years where everything that came to me and into me was what was there. I lived off the ground. Uh, I ate fruits when they were in season. I ate carrots, like the pigs do, to keep myself alive, I went long times without food. I’ve had fasts that lasted as long as 44 days. I spent my life in nature. I suppose it reconstituting myself. Reconstituting. [00:52:16][310.6]

[00:52:32] When I’m alone, I’m silent. When I was alone a long time, I was silent a long time. I was silent so long that I wondered if I could speak anymore because I spent so long in silent. I went through many, many things in those years, the years that led up to my experience with the voice. All kinds of processes that one goes through, but all of that was simply in preparation for the experience that I was gong to have. One of the things that I’ve learned about so many of the things that I was involved with in my life, why my life had been something that was so eclectic and why there was so there was so many things that I was interested in, so many things that I pursued, why I had a lifelong of experimentation with drugs, I’ve taken thousands upon thousands of drugs. I put 11,000 needles in my body. I have had taken over 2000 LSD trips, I’ve put all kinds of drugs in my body, just about everything you can imagine. All of them were in preparation for the moment that I could meet the voice. Nothing more. And nothing less. You see the nature of the shaman ways that these things are tools as a training, anything. I mean, I thought that I was looking for something. I have both my Neptunes in the 48. Neptune’s the God of drugs. I have a very powerful splenic system and fortunately, I’m still alive after all these things. But the reality was that it was just preparation, it was preparation most of all to be able to withstand the shock. You see I’m not a channel. I’m not one of these people that has contacts with angels, whatever people call these things, whether it’s Seth or Buddha consciousness, or Christ consciousness or whatever the inspiration is, I am not the son of the father, the son of the mother. I was raped, I was violated, I was brought form knowledge, something in my own experience through what I’ve been through and what I’ve read, I’ve never read anything like it. I don’t know anything that’s ever been like it. Certainly, nobody who had that experience, who wasn’t ready could have survived it. I had a very fun experience last year in America, had a woman came up to me, and she said, Oh, I wish I could have an experience like that. Hard to imagine what that’s like. Hard to imagine that it’s just something that can happen to you. Hard to imagine that, eh? I’m a deeply, deeply cynical man. I trust absolutely nothing. Never have. Never will. Still don’t. So for me to be confronted by such a force, such a thing was a, as deep shock as I’ve had. We’ll have our break now. When we come back, I’ll tell you about my dealing with the voice. [00:55:45][193.1]

[00:55:59] The demonstration there by the way, is the is the design of the energy for the ephemeris at the moment that I had contact with the voice, so, that what’s hidden, actually that illustration. There is a, I’ve had a storyteller’s life, so there is an awful lot of stories that I could tell about my process or my mystical process. But obviously, the most significant thing is about the nature of my experience with the voice. I had a very special experience on the 17th of October 1985, uh, these needles that I put in my body that I talked about this was an experimental drug, it was anesthetic called ketamine and I had my first experience with that on the 17th of October 1985. It’s a very strange thing that happens to you. It’s very quick. And it gets into your body very quickly. Uh, what it does is that it puts your body to sleep and it allows your consciousness to stay awake, so you loose your body, you die. And in my first event, what happened to me was that not only did I lose my body, disappeared entirely, but I got into some kind of a movement in space. My, felt like my body was being thrown against a wall that I was flying at enormous speeds into space. I remember having this conversation inside. Is it a Thursday? And I heard myself answer, yes. Am I on a drug? And I heard myself say, I don’t know. And I said, oh, are, are, am I going to be all right? And this voice said, this is it. And I said, This is it? It said, yes, is it. I burst into something, I call it an aroma. I don’t know how else to call it. It’s the closest I come to what people call the white, or the light, or I don’t know what all that is. All I know is that in that experience, something extraordinary happened to me and that what I smelled was intelligence. It’s a, it is not something that is possible, knowers have difficulty to explain things that are unexplainable. It’s not something I can explain, it’s only something that I can describe as an experience. It’s what I call the smelling of God, whatever that means. I have never had a truly spiritual or mystical experience in my life. And that was the first time that I came into contact with something that deeply surprised me. It’s over very quickly. You come back into your body in about 40 minutes, and it disarranges you, that is it effects your inner ear so that you have a poor sense of balance, most people get very ill. When I, was late in the evening, by the time I fell asleep and when I woke up in the morning, it had all been forgotten. It had been brought to me by a friend of John Lilly’s, John Lilly had use of the first time in his experimentations with dolphins. And uh, I had a friend of mine, an American renaissance man, first person I met that really loved God. I mean, as a concept which he considered to be himself. He kept on telling me that when he was going to die, everything was going to go with him, this want to go. Frank. And I went to see him, and I said, Frank, I’ve tried this thing called K, you should really try this. This is quite something, it’s different, you die. He said, oh, I always wanted to die. Let’s try. And he had this thing about using LSD before he did anything. So, we had to go out together on an LSD trip and we’re sitting in a little bay called chugalug up on the rocks. And the night was there. And the Ibiza sky at night is one of the more incredible things in this planet. It’s Wall-to-wall stars it’s really magnificent. And I was lying there with the stars penetrating and pulsating around me. And all of a sudden one of these stars caught my attention. I don’t know till this day what start it was, but it caught my attention and I started to stare at it. And the longer I stared at it, the stranger I felt, and then all of a sudden, my experience of smelling God came back to me and I started to cry, I started to shout. They thought I had gone mad. I was really just suddenly remembering all of that. One of the things that happened in that event was that when all of this remembering came back to me, I also knew that I was going to die. Became very clear to me that I was going to die. And that I was going to die on the 21st, 24th of September in 1986. And uh, I began to tell people that, that I was going to die. There are many stories with that, but nonetheless, when the night came, I didn’t die, but it was quite extraordinary. I had somebody come up to my tent, had a tent in the hills and come up to my tent. And they opened my tent, and they pointed a gun inside and they said, Do you really want to die? I’ll do it for you. I said, no I’m tired of this, I wanna go to sleep. When I woke up in the morning for the first time in all my years in Ibiza, I took the covering off my head. And I lived alone in a ruwena. I had had a house in Ibiza called Casabonchu. And when I stepped out and left everything behind, I left that house. And in the back of that house was an ancient ruwena where the original house was. It died about 300 years ago. All that was left was one room. It was all broken-down walls and old archways. And in that one room, the one room had been fixed up by the previous owner of the house. So it could be used as a kind of study or an extra bedroom or something that people came, wasn’t very pretty. But nonetheless, it was functional. And I had a friend of mine who was an English poet. He had no place to live. And I told him that he could come live in this ruwena. When I didn’t die. He came to me and said, you know, I have a place for you. You should get off the ground, you’ve been on the ground too long. He said, why don’t you come live in this ruwena that you gave to me and I have to go England. And so I moved into this ruwena. And I moved into this one room and had a platform inside a desk and bookshelf. And bookshelf was full of books and herbs. He was a herb collector. And there was this one door, and this door had an ancient old key, one of these huge iron keys. When around the time that my daughter was born, I used to keep drawing diaries and they were symbol diaries of my life. And they contained no words. They only contained my drawings. And on every page, there was a drawing of this key. It was many, many, many, many years before all that. And there was this wonderful key that opened up this stone. There was a Dutch couple. They were fascinated by my process. I was quite notorious for that stage and considered by most people to be dangerous. And they were fascinated with me. And they would come once a week and get me and they would bring me to their house and they would turn on their tape recorder and they would just let me talk and I would talk about what I was going through with my process. And they would give me a nice lunch and they would give me 2,000 picadas and a piece of hashish. And they would send me home. And this was, kept me alive. On January the 3rd, 1987, it was a day when I had visited them and picked me up in the morning, I’d gone to them. And I was disturbed that day because I had enormous pain in my mouth, a toothache. And when the day was done, Phillips said to me, Do you need anything? And I said, you have anything for a toothache? The obvious joke about that. He offered me something called mopac. And then they drove me back to the highway near my rowina. We do this in candlelight, I could scare the hell out of you. [01:05:53][594.8]

[01:06:09] I can’t get it out of my head so I might as well get rid of it. My friend Frank, it’s one of the favorite stories that I’ve ever heard anybody tell me. He was in the Korean War, while he was in the Korean War, and he was a 19-year-old soldier in the U.S. Army. And he was on the front line fighting the Chinese and he was in a trench in one of these pits and it was the wintertime. So, everything was covered with snow. And he was in this pit by himself, a self-confessed coward. I mean he was terrified that this was all going to be the end for him. And the thing you had to listen for was that listen for the sound of the snow crunching because you knew that the Chinese soldiers that were wearing these soft padded boots, you could hear them moving across the snow. You knew you better stand up and look and see what’s there. And he heard it and he said everything inside of him just went totally numb. You could not move. You could not do anything. And then he heard it and he heard it. And then all of a sudden, Chinese grenade comes over the top of this pit and lands right inside his trench. And there’s a grenade right in front of him. And he’s just standing there, frozen, can’t do anything. And it didn’t go off. And he said, you know, he stood there for hours and he said it did not go off. And he knew after that he said that he was in charge of the universe. He was convinced. I’m always hoping that Frank stays alive. [01:07:45][96.0][01:07:54] I give names to everything. I even give names to the things I cook. I give names to everything, and I lived with a dog. The only animal in my life that was ever a pet never came close to me, and his name was Barley Baker. All my animals have last names. He had a last name. His name was Barley Baker. Barley was savage, was a natural born killer. And he had a, he had a master that never fed him, I never had any food. So, he had to feed himself. So, he would hunt sheep and get shot, he’d kill chickens and he would do all those things that carnivores do, he was a carnivore. The only thing was that he knew me from the moment that I was two days old when, when he was given to me by a, the daughter of a friend of mine. And so, he knew my scent and he was alright with me, but he didn’t like people and he certainly did. I watched him one day kill a dog in a dog fight. He was savage. So, I arrive. It’s dark, it’s wintertime and it’s dark early. And I arrive at the bottom of the hill, at the highway. And the moment that I step onto the path, I can, I can feel it because it’s, you live that kind of a life, I always have a deep connection to animals. And he just immediately picks up my smell. He knows I’m there. And he comes and he says oh. And we climb up the hill. And when we get to the top of the hill, there’s a terrace and go along with the terrace. I’m walking along the terrace this way. What is in front of me is the original front door of the house. But the only thing that’s there is the archway. The walls are gone. The ceiling is gone. And you can look through the archway and you can see the little room that the ruwena was, that was the, would have been the room that they had built with their first child because it was the smallest, the smallest room in the house. The room sat over a cisterna, an empty well, the well went dry about three hundred years ago, it’s why the house was given up. So this room was sitting over a cavern. Inside of the room there was a uh, butuna bottle that ran a little gas stove and above the platform where I slept, hanging from a beam, there was a kerosene lantern and the kerosene lantern had never been on, because it was out of kerosene. And I could not afford either to get it, nor was, I didn’t even know where to get it as a matter of fact aside from anything else. So, I’m walking along with Barley along this terrace. And when I get outside of the main entrance to the house, outside of the archway, I already begin to feel uncomfortable. I don’t know why. But anyway, in that moment, a tightening in my stomach muscles. And I stepped through the, the old, the old archway, and as I stepped through the archway, I realized because it’s a shock to me that there is a light underneath my door. Now, this is an ancient, evacanco door. It’s got this one big fat iron key. There’s only one key. You can’t break that lock. I mean, I guess you could, but it’s not the kind of thing where anybody could just get in. But it was more the light that disturbed me. I lived, occasionally, occasionally I would have a candle, but rarely have light. I’m an Aries it was easy for me to go to sleep at five o’clock in the afternoon and get up at four o’clock in the morning. I mean, I lived my own world it didn’t make any difference to me. So I was standing there and there is light under the door and Barley, who normally goes ahead of me, is behind and I’m very aware of the fact that he’s behind me and that he’s not interested in all of that. And he’s not moving. It was the first joke for me, because the door was maybe as close as I am to this door here. And I shouted at it and what I sounded was, who there? This is my joke. And I shouted, Who’s there? And the, the ruwena sits on a hill that goes down into a valley. And on the other side there’s a whole range of hills. So, in this night, in the dark, with this strip of light under my door, I hear my own voice echoing through the valley. Who is there?

6 replies on “Unexpected Path to Destiny (pt 2 of 2)- 1997 Grey Course – Ahr Zhe Winnie (97.04)”

AZW is a character, one of several I’ve created who’s sharing much of Ra’s message here. This is work in progress that will by design bring more attention to uniqueness, tolerance and comfort in changing times.

AZW is a character I created. Ra, not unlike other public figures or celebrities, has a story to be told that in some cases are held back by legal and other financial concerns. I’m just entering this space following an inner guide and recognizing some patterns here that resonate with me. I began studying Ra when I stumbled across someone in a dark place who mentioned Ra when I told him of my life and some work I’d done with other mystical and deep spiritual writers, Gurdjieff, Hesse, even Twain on the heels of some of the scientists I’ve followed and an inner urging to avoid the general push toward success in athletics and business after living up to my family obligations. This work is intended to be creative, but honor the message and patterns set forth in the setting that brought forth the material in the Grey Courses, considering the fact that much of this material seemed to be obscure prior to my recent transcriptions of it for my own personal character development and it just kind of slipped out into some forums organically.

You are welcome. Thanks for passing this along. One at a time. Popular is a word similar to surprise and its spelling is known, to share and be – all the best …

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