The Allure and Pitfalls of Scale: A Veteran’s Perspective

Having spent years navigating the high-stakes world of oil and gas deals, I’ve witnessed firsthand the contrasting realities of “big” versus “small” operations. I oversaw the construction of narratives for deals worth over $10 billion, ensuring they were technically sound while highlighting the most appealing aspects for potential clients. Later, I transitioned to the acquisition side, leading startups and establishing operations for them. I raised over $1.3 billion and acquired numerous assets and built out the staff and systems to operate them.

Let me quickly share where I’m coming from. I’m an engineer who achieved a lot, but my heart wasn’t in it. Early childhood trauma led me down a path of deep healing. Now, I share my experiences hoping to make your journey a little easier. Fair warning: I’m someone who gives a lot to discover what’s next. If that bothers you, feel free to tune into someone else!

What I learned is that while larger entities often project an image of stability and sophistication, closer inspection reveals that competence and fundamental truths eventually surface, regardless of appearances. These truths are often obscured by legal complexities and defended by those whose positions rely on maintaining illusions. They are not easily uncovered, often hidden beneath the well-meaning intentions of professionals who unwittingly support these fragile narratives.

After a decade-long break, I’ve reflected on these experiences, applying my knowledge of storytelling and truth-vetting to creative pursuits like acting, filmmaking, and writing. This leads to the question: who benefits from these stories? There’s a temptation to tell people what they want to hear, even when its validity is questionable. This isn’t always malicious; often, the messengers genuinely believe what they’re conveying. However, like the unhealthy diets promoted in the past, many of today’s products and schemes are equally dubious.

I recall an entrepreneur who presented a hydraulic power generator with unrealistic assumptions of his widget being spun in the ocean. While several bankers and dealmakers were initially intrigued, credible oil company investment arms quickly dismissed it. I knew it wouldn’t work, but I observed how far the facade would go. Despite my engineering concerns, the story persisted for over a year until the flawed assumptions became undeniable.

Fundamentals matter, even when they’re harsh. Survival isn’t always pretty. The American westward expansion, with its displacement of Native Americans and conflicts with religious groups, serves as a stark reminder.

Personally, “small is beautiful” resonates deeply, likely due to my own biases. I’m drawn to characters like those portrayed by Taylor Kitsch—individuals ostracized from society, independent, and often misunderstood. In “True Detective,” he plays a tormented young man grappling with alcoholism and a neglectful mother. In “American Primeval,” his character, Isaac Reed, is a mountain man haunted by loss, seeking redemption in the brutal landscape of the American West.

In my past, larger deals meant happier staff, friendlier clients, and bigger budgets. It was like working with a generous friend. Smaller deals, however, often involved meticulous scrutiny, constant questioning, and a tendency to sound alarms—behaviors honed from running enterprises on a smaller scale.

The challenge was navigating the eccentricities and self-defeating behaviors of smaller clients, who were particularly vulnerable to commodity price fluctuations. Even the smartest minds in the industry, managing billions in speculative energy projects, frequently misjudged future oil prices. However, those affiliated with larger firms often had a safety net, while smaller firms faced potentially disastrous consequences.

Ultimately, while the allure of “big” can be intoxicating, the true test lies in the resilience and adaptability found in the “small.” It’s a reminder that the most compelling stories are often those forged in the face of adversity, where fundamentals reign supreme and authenticity prevails over illusion.

So, after years spent building narratives in the oil and gas world, then pivoting to creative fields like acting and filmmaking, I’ve learned that both business and art demand a relentless pursuit of truth. Now, imagine applying that same lens to something like the government. It’s like Elon Musk or Trump stepping into a world accustomed to playing by professional rules, trying to perform a public audit. The media, trained to protect the established game, finds itself grappling with contradictions as these figures attempt to cut through the noise and expose the fundamentals. It’s messy, unconventional, and maybe even painful, but sometimes, that’s what it takes to see the reality beneath the surface. Just like a flawed oil deal or a character grappling with inner demons, the truth, however uncomfortable, eventually surfaces.

Ultimately the outcome will have a bearing on our lives. The more in tune we are with the fundamentals, history it seems to me, tunes those equipped to recognize and respond to those truths of a never ending backdrop of nature.

I’m Mark Roach. Wishing you all the best.